youarenotnat

I can tell this is just the beginning. I still need to face my homework, my school, my friends. My dad. But the difference between today and last Saturday is that for the first time in a while, I can look forward to the things I want to do in my life. Bike, eat, drink, talk. Ride the subway, read, read maps. Make maps, make art. Tell my parents i wanna study overseas. Tell my dad not to stress about it. Hug my mom. Kiss my little sister. Kiss my dad. Make out with Jill. Make out with her more. Take her on a picnic. See a movie with her. See a movie with friends. Have a party. Help people like Bobby. Like Muqtada. Like me. Draw more. Draw a person. Draw a naked person. Draw Jill naked. Run, travel, swim, skip. Yeah, I know it's lame, but, whatever. Skip anyway. Breathe... Live.

Don't get me wrong though there's boys in bands and
kids who like to scrap with pool cues in their hands and
just cause he's had a coupla cans he thinks it's alright to act like a dickhead

When I'm at the beach, I'm in a speedo trying to tan my cheeks

Will there be another one quite as desirable as you?
One look sends it coursing through the veins, oh how the feeling races
Back up to their brains to form expressions on their stupid faces

I sit on a man's back, choking him and making him carry me, and yet assure myself and others that I am very sorry for him and wish to ease his lot by all possible means - except by getting off his back.

i get so distracted by some people’s reactions that i don’t see my own faults for what they are,